Tuesday, March 1, 2011

defensive

...nakakapagod na umintindi sa mga taong makikitid ang utak. Kahit anong gawin mo, may kulang ka pa rin,kahit anong pilit mo, mali ka pa rin.

Ang dedefensive lang eh, akala nila perpekto sila. Pwedeng mas mataas lang  kayo sa'kin, pero sinasabi ko sa inyo, sa height lang kayo lamang dahil hindi ako magpapatalo at susuko! Nagpapakabait na ako pero nakakapikon kasi eh, kaya nga tayo iba't-iba ng role di ba? kung pwede lang sabihin na "OH E DI IKAW NA DITO, PALIT TAYO ONE TIME LANG"!

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This was suppose to be a status message in my facebook account, but since it says that status messages are limited to 420 characters only, I opted to write this as a blog instead.
forgive me if this doesn't look or sound good to you. I just wanted to make everything spontaneous.  This is what happened, and this is what I feel. This is me!

A phone call woke me up today. It was a call from a student who is seeking for my rescue.  She was too confused that she actually didn't know what to do or what to answer. She doesn't know what to do.  Apparently a teacher from her department told her that she needed detailed information about the project i allegedly disapproved. 

and then I opened my mail, and got another complaint letter apparently of the many mistakes we have been doing in performing our jobs. I mean, is that that easy? Can you tell me I am wrong just because you didn't get what you wanted?

Hays... (sigh) Why are people used to assuming things?  Submission doesn't always mean approval.  Just like in life, right? It doesn't mean that when you want something, you can easily get it.  It doesn't mean that you made all efforts to do something, you can already compel people to believe in you or to heed to your demands.

I am not making their lives miserable.  All I am asking is that, they must learn to value my role as I value theirs.  We were not put here for the name's sake only.  We have different roles to play, and we all deserve to be respected.  I am not asking for too much. i am not demanding that they bend their knees before me just to get my approval, all I am asking is that for them to learn that we are all important. We can all work things out if they just won't be defensive, If they would just listen and ask for details first.

I just hope they won't be immediately defensive. There is no aggression yet!

kung alam mo lang...

Kung alam mo lang na nanggaling din ako diyan
Kung alam mo lang na ilang beses din akong nasaktan
Kung alam mo lang ilang baldeng luha din ang aking nailuha bago ako napatahan
Kung alam mo lang ilang beses din halos ang buhay ay gustong wakasan
Kung alam mo lang naramdaman ko rin lahat ‘yan
Kung alam mo lang umibig din ako at iniwan
Kung alam mo lang…….kung alam mo lang…

puso

tumitibok-tibok na ang puso
wait...saglit...stop! hinto!
tumatalon-talon na sa saya at kaba
hindi yan, umiibig ka? hindi pa!

kumakaba-kaba at kinikilig-kilig
hay naku puso, wag kang maligalig.
nagmamahal, nag-aalala ka na
pigilan mo muna hangga't handa na

muli nang gumagana ang tulog na puso
takot lang naman akong ika'y mabigo
pamamahinga ngayo'y tapos na...
kung ganun sige, papayagan kita.

salamat puso, pumapalakpak
basta't paganahin ako pati na ang utak
ang pagmamahal muling makakamit
bubuuin ang puso...sa tamis at pait.