Friday, March 18, 2011

even if I AM SINGLE!

I haven't felt more pressured in my life until now.
When I open my social networking pages, I would see people (batchmate, officemates, childhood friends) with their kids, or their special someone in their profile pictures.
Also, I would receive countless wedding, baptismal, and birthday invitations from different sets of friends, and I would wonder? When will I have them? When will I get to experience the joy of being with someone, of walking down the aisle, or having a child of my own?
Sometimes, it just makes me feel sad and I admit, it's kinda depressing also. I kept asking, what's wrong. Is it me? Is it the way I speak, the way I look? What could possibly be the reason why I am still alone?  I kept searching, and in searching, I found an old friend.  She is happily married and with  two kids.  Just like me, she also experienced the kind of waiting, the kind of feeling I have now.

She sent me this note which to me, looked like a note from God.  I just felt that it was written for me:

Dear Purple,

     Everyone longs to give himself / herself completely to someone, to have a deep soul relationship with another - to be loved thoroughly and exclusively.   But I say to you: "Not until you are satisfied, fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone -- with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to Me: with having an intensely personal and unique relationship with Me alone, discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found - will you be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with Me - exclusive of anyone of anything else, exclusive of any other desires or longings.  I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing - one that you cannot imagine. I want you to have the best. Please allow Me to bring it to you. You just keep watching Me, expecting the 
greatest things. Keep experiencing the satisfaction that 
I am.  
Keep listening and learning the things that I tell you. You just have to wait, that's all! 
Don't be anxious. Don't worry.  Don't look around at the things others have gotten or that I've given  them. Don't look around at the things you think you want. You just 
keep looking at Me, or you will miss what I want to show you.  
And then, when you are ready, I'll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than anything you would dream of. You see, until you are ready, and until the one I have for you is ready - (I am working even at this moment to have both of you ready at the same time) - until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me, and the life prepared for you, you won't be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me, and this is the perfect love. And, dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love. I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me, and to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty, perfection and love. What I offer you is Myself.  Know that I love you utterly. I am God.  Believe it and be satisfied."
                                                                                                                                                         - God

and then I realized....
waiting is not so hard to do after all. There are so many things that I can do while waiting like seeking God, enjoying life as it is now, and just be happy, even if I AM SINGLE!